True coffee snobbery

Lady: I’d like an Americano, please. But with two long shots instead of regular shots.

Me: I’m sorry, our machine is pre-set so I can’t do long shots.

Lady: You mean you can’t pull them by hand?

Me: I can, but I have no way of measuring them since our shot glasses broke.

Lady: You… don’t have any shot glasses? At all?

Me: Nope!

Lady: It’s just all… so… mechanical…

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